I know the rest of the world hates Joe Theismann, but I love the guy. I'm the one guy who is unhappy he's lost his gig. He's old-school. He's opinionated. He's narcissistic, but he's also intermittently self-effacing. He doesn't mind if guests crack on him about his career-ending injury (and about all of them do). He was an undersized player and he wore that cool single-bar facemask. Joe is arrogant. Joe is obstinate. Joe is cool.

Theismann is also a better color guy than Ron Jaworski. Joe doesn't have Jaworski's mind, but Ron is made to break down film and cheese it up for the camera. Joe is probably better suited for color for all the reasons that the rest of you hate him. He pisses people off and says idiotic things. That's entertainment! Ron Jaworski is just too smart and too slick. Just like Norman Einstein. You'd never see Joe in those fancy ten-button suit and designer glasses.

The main reason I'll miss Joe is that he's a little dumb. Dumb people say funny stuff. Here are a few of the best.

Top-Five Joe Theismann quotes:

1. There was only one Vince Lombardi, and he died.
2. Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.
3. People remember what they were doing the night my leg was broken.
4. Rugby is great. The players don't wear helmets or padding; they just beat the living daylights out of each other and then go for a beer. I love that.
5. Anybody can throw an incomplete pass, but if you can deliver when the opportunity is there, you're going to be a success.

Joe, don't go! Say It Ain't So!